You are drugs to me, I am addicted.

WheeWheeeWheeeee.Finally I can sign in to my blogger.
Dear blog, finally we can meet again. =DDD
Last Tuesday when I am in the ICAEW conference thingy, Grant Thornton called me.
I am not trying to show off or whatever here. It just that I am very happy.
I know I know I haven't start interview and it still a doubt that I can get the position.
But still I am very happy because I almost gave up that time. Sent my resume and CV to almost 10 companies,ended up only 1 rejected me and 9 no news at all.
Therefore I am very happy although I need to interview, because at least I got a chance.
Wish me luck please I am VERY VERY very very scared. =.=
No, I can't scared. If I scared then I will ruined everything.
I don't want that happen and I won't let that happen. =)
Suddenly got a gut feeling that I want to pursue what I want.
Yeah, like what they said, girls actually when they found their true love,
they are willing to give up what they have been working for so hard, and just got married.
Yeah, maybe for now I can't feel the TRUE LOVE, but for NOW, I have what I want to pursue.
I want to change I want to learn. I want to be perfect.
I want a life that I think is perfect. I want to be good and I am working on it.
I know it will be a journey, but I like it because it is what I want and I will be the one who enjoy the result.
I am the director of my life so I am the one who decide where to go. =DDD
Urgh, but these days I seriously found someone is a drug for me.
Nahhhh, I think it will be just temporary. =)

=D

I don't want to look at you from miles away, I want to be with you

Heeeellllo world.
Yes yes yes. It's been a while since my last update.
There are 2 good news and 3 bad news today.
I will go for the bad news first. =)
My lecturer keep on rejecting my questionnaire!!!!!!!!
I am sooooooo frustrated!!!!!
Yeah yeah, it shall means that I am so weak in guiding people.
But seriously I don't know why she don't understand something that she suggested us to do it from the beginning.
Why ar?Is it because DOCTOR tends to think in a harder and complicated way ar?
Yes yes yes, I know you are a doctor but please others are JOURNALIST.
Urgh, maybe its my wrong too. I should have stated it clearer. I should have improved.
Okay okay. Sigh. All my PLANS has been ruined. =.=
By the way, the second bad news, I have not study for my FA exam!!!!! Oh gosh, yes I should have spend my blogging time in studying. But I have no mood AT ALL. So ahahahahahahahahah. I will study for it I will. =DDD
Next, I have wasted my holidaysssssssss. My precious holidaysssssssss.
I have no time. Kept on going out going out going out.
I need time to study. Why is the time flying so FAST???
I spent the whole holiday on my bed and going out.
What happen to me? I should have studied. T^T
I don't know why I am so tired and keep on SLEEPING. =.=
Urghhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Okay, the good news turn.
I will be going to a small city in UK this July for 3 weeks.
I am happy because I have not got the chance to sit in an airplane.
Haha. But actually I think everybody got the chance lar.
The second good news is I won a pair of tickets. Pirates of the Caribbean =DDDDD
I am going to watch it tonight. =DDDD
Wheeeeeeeeee. For those who like my stupid post, thank you. =)
That's all for this post.
Annyheong.=D

You just passed by without looking back and it makes me hurt

Hello world, hello you.
It's been a while since my last update.
Nahhhhh, busy doing BUSINESS STRATEGY assignment.
Seriously, it is soooooo damn torturing.
I kept laughing like an idiot when I printed the assignment out a night before the due date.
You can't imagine how happy am I.
Seriously, I am so damn happy although I knew that I have did it wrong.
But it has been bothering me for I-don't-know-how-many-weekendsssss and it made me started to hate weekend because it somehow so torturing when you are looking at those pilessss of homework but you can't deal with it because of this assignment.
Some-more, you don't have the choice but to deal with it. Seriously, it is soooo damn torturing!!!
Nahhhhh, I knew we faced this kind of situation when we work out there, but still I hate it. =,=
And due to the assignment cause-and-effect relationship, I am sooooooo lazy now. I don't want to move I don't want to study I just want to lay on my bed or go for SHOPPING. I want to buy lotsss of things. T.T
My uni is organizing an "Get Hired" activity that invite big firms and companies to walk-in interview students.
Apparently, I am not the lucky one although I didn't hand in my resume.
It is obvious right because there are so damn many talent students, so what for they will waste their time in interviewing a student which get a below average mark and is not active in curriculum?
Yes, the one who get a below average mark and is not active in curriculum is ME.
Actually it really feels bad when everyday there are tonss of students dressed formally, looked nervous. it really feels bad.
You know what? Whenever there is a good chance, it will always not my turn to get it.
I don't know why, is it because I am not lucky enough to get a good chance?
Or I do not deserve it?
I am really worried about the internship. You are worrying which company to send in your resume, which company will accept you while others are worried in choosing among the companies that offered them for interns. Do you feel the contrast?
The world is unfair I know.
I am a perfectionist. So whenever I can't get what I want when I have tried my best, it will be a huge impact on me. And maybe because of this impact, it make me have lots of negative thinking which has an adverse motivation.
But I just can't help it. I don't know why but I just can't help with it. Sigh. I am struggling now. I want someone to talk to but I can't find any. It is so pathetic.
I have applied for the summer program although I knew that I will not have a chance.
I want to change. I want to be the person that I want to be. It's hard I know. I am so depressed and emo now.
But still I want to change, I don't want to be who I am now. I want to be stronger.
I want to gain back my confidence which I have none of it.
I want to be confident.
I want to be what I want to be.